Okay, so I heard the new Superman movie was liberal trash, so of course I needed to go see it. I went today with my mom, and LOVED it. The last Superman movie with the Henry Calvill was good (I like that he was arrested and imprisoned because I'm kinky like that) but this was was superb!
James Gunn let us fill in the blanks instead of telling us the same story we already know, and Guy Garder of the Justice League was in it!! I used to read Justice League West just for him because he was an incredible asshole, and I loved him. It was so great to recognize him. And I loved that there were other heroes and people were all like, yeah, we know. Without the whole coming out to humanity as a superhero shit.
Anyway, there are several movie cinemas in my city. My phone brought me to the wrong one first, and I just left. It's in a crowded strip mall that's hard to park in and has nasty construction blocking one side of the four lane road.
I went to the gringo side of town instead, the mall with the Apple Store, Dairy Queen, Carls Junior, and KFC. Still out doors, but with tarps blocking the sun. Very clean and nice to walk around.
I got there at noon and realized I was too early. They have two versions of the movie running: English with Spanish subtitles, or a Dubbed version. YAY! So I can still see the movies I want in English.
We walked around and spent too much money on crap because everything in that mall is American prices. And yet, we were the only gringos. There's plenty of rich Mexicans with designer clothes and designer purses. They're doing just fine, thank you.
Finally we went back to the theater, again too early. In the USA if you're too early they don't let you in until the current showing is over. Here they DGAF. So we got to watch the dubbed ending of Superman before watching the subtitled version.
The theater was nice. They have plastic trays that all theaters really should have for carrying popcorn and drinks. The popcorn side is deep, so that if you spill it, it stays in the tray. Very nice. At the end of the movie I saw everyone obediently bringing their trays to the trashcan, dumping them, and piling them beside it.
Also, the door to leave back into the lobby area was open...so I was able to get to the bathrooms fast before our showing started. I brought my ticket just in case, but no one cared.
Now for the issues: No handicapped seats. There's an area directly in front of the screen, but you're craning your neck and the picture looks terrible. And yet, that's where one woman in a wheelchair had to sit. If you can't climb the stairs you have no choice.
My mom commiserated with her in the bathroom. She hated that she had to watch it there. Said her neck hurt. My walker-bound mom agreed. They need handicapped seating that you can access that isn't just the first fucking row. It's actually closer than the first row, because she couldn't sit in the seat, she had to park in front of a seat.
Next time I got to a movie here I'm going to see if there's any theaters that do have handicapped access.
But this time, I had to bring my stuff upstairs to our assigned seats (no way we were going to sit right in front). Then I had to carry mom mom's shopping bag laden walker all the way up, and sit in a seat that had space beside it on the first landing so we could fold it up by her seat. Then my mom, who was blind in the theater's darkness, had to slowly climb up the stairs and be guided to a proper seat. Annoying, but worth it to get a good view of the movie.
Also annoying is there's no ticket stand. We only saw computer screens that were a nightmare to use. I swear a witch cursed me to not be able to use touch screens. These touch screens were especially obnoxious because you had to guide a mouse cursor to where you wanted to click and the thing wouldn't fucking move. I asked for help. I think he said to go to the food stand to buy tickets with cash, but he ended up helping me finish on the terminal.
Now for the food stand. There's only one size of soda, a normal tall cup. Probably a medium in the USA. And it's $60 which is $3. I think that's cheap for movie soda. They have Taki's covered hot dogs, candy of both Mexican and American origin (no Jr. Mints, but some Peanut M&Ms) and Palomitas which is popcorn.
There were three different popcorn bins. Red popcorn, which I assume is with Doritos dust or spicy Doritos dust or something. Yellow popcorn called Mantequilla (butter in Spanish, but they didn't put extra butter on it). And caramel corn. Wow. Also it didn't stink. There was no scent of popcorn luring you in.
To the side there was also a Frappe stand (crushed ice caramel coffees, crushed ice fruit drinks and other flavors, including cajeta which means 'little box' so I have no idea what it was). This stand also sold crepes with cream cheese/fruit, or nutella, or chocolate and more.
Kitty corner to this stand, was a softserve ice cream stand with waffle cones. And a few arcade games.
Okay so we're in the movie. There were some movie previews, but also two 'talk show/advertisements' of a man and a woman talking about the movie and a few other movies, making jokes and bantering, then working in commercials for deoderant and the concessions. They had two shows before the movie.
We saw a Smurfs movie preview, but they call them a completely different word, and then...something amazing.
It's a cartoon. Disney quality, but very dark and serious. It shows the Aztecs and the Conquistadors coming to brutalize them. Cortez is a main character, but half his face is burned so he wears a covering over half of it (like...TWO FACE?) It was all in Spanish so I only got bits and pieces, but the Aztec warrior goes into one of their temples asking an Aztec bat god for help. The tides start to turn, but then the conquistadors sends a crazy murderer with clown makeup after the Aztecs...kind of like the JOKER? Then we get the title...and Batman music...BATMAN AZTECA. OMG. I FUCKING WANT TO SEE THIS SO BAD! Is this in the USA too? It seems like a Mexican only cartoon. Oh! I hope they have an English version.
And then the movie, which was loud but great. I'll definitely see it on streaming a second time. Afterwards, I struggled to haul my food tray and my mom's walker down the stairs, while she worked her way down slowly holding the handrail.
So...yeah. Good and bad. And the tickets for the matinee for me and mom mom were $10usd. Can't beat that!
I figure it out when they say Guason (Joker) And as soon I so the cave I say Batman.
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